I feel like I now have a PhD in creativity. Chronic illness has taught me how I can create without the chaotic magic and under sub-optimal circumstances. This is what I’ve learnt.
There's so much here that resonates with me about the relationship of creativity and chronic illness. What is particularly striking is the idea that inspiration can be a privilege. Having the space, the capacity to explore novelty, and the energy that allow inspiration to emerge are privileges. For me, they come and go, so I recognize the privilege of the times when inspiration flows. I hope that recognizing this privilege helps me cultivate more gratitude for those times and become less focused on the times where the well is dry.
Thank you so much for this reflection! I too found that gratitude when inspiration comes has helped me accept the times when it’s dried up… at least to some degree.
Yes, it helps to a degree. It doesn’t make the pain of the dry spells go away, but at least I find myself being fully aware and appreciative of the inspired moments.
My persistent chronic pain has taught me that sharing my writing craft can heal me and support others. I've written professionally about health care and health care policy for many years and have always leveraged my creative gift of unpacking the complex in simple terms. When I stepped into the light to talk about my hidden illness of chronic pain my writing took new flight.
Yeah there are days weeks months where my brain is so tired I can’t use my imagination. I wait for it to return reminding myself rest is my friend. I do try to write a line a day. When I’m having hard time being creative it might just be about how I felt that day but I do try to create images & metaphors when my brain is working better. It keeps me tied to creativity & poetry, which fill me with joy. Good luck everybody. 💗💗
Thank you for sharing these deeply relatable insights, Madelleine. Your reflections on adapting creativity to the rhythms of chronic illness feel both practical and compassionate, a true acknowledgment of what it means to navigate limitations while still honoring your creative self.
I particularly connected with your idea of breaking creative acts into tiny, manageable steps. As someone on a recovery journey, this resonates deeply—it feels like an invitation to meet ourselves where we are, making space for expression without overwhelming our energy reserves.
The focus on visualizing the process rather than the goal also speaks to me. It reframes creativity as an accessible, present-moment practice, which is so empowering. This gentle, step-by-step approach has been transformative in my own life, turning daunting projects into experiences of small, meaningful progress.
Your story is a powerful reminder that creativity isn’t about perfection but about persistence and presence. Thank you for your honesty and for sharing strategies that honor both the struggles and the resilience of living creatively within constraints. 💛
This essay really struck a chord in me. My creativity used to be my reason to live and as my illnesses have progressed and diagnoses mount, I find it hard to make the time for it as well as enjoy the whole process of getting lost in it as I used to. Thank you for being as realistic and honest with how you manage your health and allow time for creativity when and how you can manage.
I’m so sorry to hear that your creativity and health has taken a toll. It’s so hard. I hope you find your own way some day of getting more creativity back into your life — if that’s what you want of course 🌸❤️
I didn’t realise I was creative until I was in recovery from chronic illness. Though I say recovery, I was mid massive relapse when I began writing for an audience.
My mum used to say things to us like “everyone in our family is creative except you”. Referring to playing musical instruments, sewing etc. so I had no clue creativity was part of being human.
though I feel the education system plays a big part in this too. I find it peculiar that we know kids need creativity to engage so we make sure there’s lots of it initially. Then we gradually take creative play out of the curriculum over time. Even though we know kids learn that way, enjoy it and it improves outcomes🤔
Initially, I was able to write one short post on average of about every 3 weeks. It took a couple of years to build into full blog posts and accumulate to one a week.
Lately I’m consistent in sharing 2-3 blogs a week but my energy is on another level this year and I’ve also managed to write and publish my first e-book (unleashing my inner power).
I’m currently making significant updates to my next book, Migraine & Me: Companion, Guide & Journal. It’s been in first draft for 3 years and I’ve updated it so significantly (from just a journal), it’s a massive amount of work.
I’m meant to have submitted it by now but illness takes priority. It’s challenging to not pile pressure on myself and trust in the process but it’s the only way forward I’ve been able to learn in recent years.
Oh no that must have stung, what your mother said. That can really create a creative block. I love hearing your reflections here, Amber! And congrats on your writing, Wow!
I had a massive creative block -which spectacularly was to do with my mother (unbeknown to me - I didn’t even know it was there)…
I released it as part of some heart meditation and forgiveness over the summer, which I had to do 3 times for it to work (on top of years of this stuff).
It cleared the biggest energetic block that day and meant this ebook was finally ready for the world 🌎
Mother wound healing…it’s something else. And it is not about blame. Not from this place💜
Yes absolutely it’s not about blame. I got a lot of compassion for my mother when I went theough mother wound healing. And Wow, I love it when blocks are cleared!
Oh this hits home 💖 I used to sing in a choir too (soprano) and now I can't anymore. I really miss it.
My illness has made me incredibly intentional about everything, especially creativity. I'm very limited too in what I can do and when and for how long so if I'm going to start something, then I really mean it (does that make sense?) xx
I love everything about this essay. It's so true that chronic illness can both help and hinder the creative process. You learn a kind of brutal efficiency when you have such limited energy, and it can help to break down large tasks into manageable chunks, and at the same time you are often so wrung out you have no flow. Thanks for sharing ❤️
This is beautiful and helpful. I just posted about how I’ve been struggling to figure out how to be creative in this new body with so many limitations and asked for advice! Thanks for sharing your experience.
This is so helpful. I have recently learnt that I have ADHD...I'm 68 and have been disabled my whole life. Very limited in independence and mobility my creativity has changed recently. It has always been that I had more ideas than energy and would use resting time to fuel ideas. Silly. I would plan future projects and shop for them. I have a house full of art and crafts, wool and fabric. Probably much more than my possible 3 decades left can use. I have put aside the crafts for which I am too disabled, those which are too physical, like screen printing. I focus on those which I can do myself or with controlled help. ( I have a support worker 3 mornings a week, but she is utterly clueless about art sewing or the collections that come with being creative, I can't ask her for help with tidying because her instinct is to bin everything, let alone recycle). Recently I have found an art class that works at my level, and it has been an eye opener. Suddenly, the ability to start at 9.30 and finish at 12, with a led idea, constraints etc, has been a game changer. My skills have developed exponentially and my focus is far better. So I had to think carefully about what is going on in that scenario and see if I can replicate it at home.
1 is beginning with focus. Know what you are intending to do. Part of something... which part.
2 time limit. However short.
3 materials at hand or chosen for someone else to access.
4 do not create with chaos around you.
I'm suddenly intent on making sense of the chaos I tend to live in because I have neither the energy or skill to organise and order it. Previously it would be guaranteed to give me a panic attack. Understanding myself, the impact of ADHD on my thought process has been liberating. Adopting strategies to manage ADHD has helped manage my physical energy too ( do a difficult task for 10 minutes then reward). I don't think my whole house will ever be showhome presentable...there are too many books, but there is already much less stuff.
Wow I love hearing about your process and ways you make it work for you! The art class sounds amazing, I’m so happy to hear you found something that works for you within your limitations 🌸❤️
The ebbs and flows of my energy remind me that we are cyclical human beings and that constant progress is an illusion
So true!
There's so much here that resonates with me about the relationship of creativity and chronic illness. What is particularly striking is the idea that inspiration can be a privilege. Having the space, the capacity to explore novelty, and the energy that allow inspiration to emerge are privileges. For me, they come and go, so I recognize the privilege of the times when inspiration flows. I hope that recognizing this privilege helps me cultivate more gratitude for those times and become less focused on the times where the well is dry.
Thank you so much for this reflection! I too found that gratitude when inspiration comes has helped me accept the times when it’s dried up… at least to some degree.
Yes, it helps to a degree. It doesn’t make the pain of the dry spells go away, but at least I find myself being fully aware and appreciative of the inspired moments.
My persistent chronic pain has taught me that sharing my writing craft can heal me and support others. I've written professionally about health care and health care policy for many years and have always leveraged my creative gift of unpacking the complex in simple terms. When I stepped into the light to talk about my hidden illness of chronic pain my writing took new flight.
Wow I love this!
That is so powerful!
Yeah there are days weeks months where my brain is so tired I can’t use my imagination. I wait for it to return reminding myself rest is my friend. I do try to write a line a day. When I’m having hard time being creative it might just be about how I felt that day but I do try to create images & metaphors when my brain is working better. It keeps me tied to creativity & poetry, which fill me with joy. Good luck everybody. 💗💗
I like your ‘line a day’ commitment 🌸❤️
Thank you for sharing these deeply relatable insights, Madelleine. Your reflections on adapting creativity to the rhythms of chronic illness feel both practical and compassionate, a true acknowledgment of what it means to navigate limitations while still honoring your creative self.
I particularly connected with your idea of breaking creative acts into tiny, manageable steps. As someone on a recovery journey, this resonates deeply—it feels like an invitation to meet ourselves where we are, making space for expression without overwhelming our energy reserves.
The focus on visualizing the process rather than the goal also speaks to me. It reframes creativity as an accessible, present-moment practice, which is so empowering. This gentle, step-by-step approach has been transformative in my own life, turning daunting projects into experiences of small, meaningful progress.
Your story is a powerful reminder that creativity isn’t about perfection but about persistence and presence. Thank you for your honesty and for sharing strategies that honor both the struggles and the resilience of living creatively within constraints. 💛
Thank you so much for your words and reflections here! And yes, creativity is indeed about persistence and presence, I love that 🌸❤️
This essay really struck a chord in me. My creativity used to be my reason to live and as my illnesses have progressed and diagnoses mount, I find it hard to make the time for it as well as enjoy the whole process of getting lost in it as I used to. Thank you for being as realistic and honest with how you manage your health and allow time for creativity when and how you can manage.
I’m so sorry to hear that your creativity and health has taken a toll. It’s so hard. I hope you find your own way some day of getting more creativity back into your life — if that’s what you want of course 🌸❤️
I didn’t realise I was creative until I was in recovery from chronic illness. Though I say recovery, I was mid massive relapse when I began writing for an audience.
My mum used to say things to us like “everyone in our family is creative except you”. Referring to playing musical instruments, sewing etc. so I had no clue creativity was part of being human.
though I feel the education system plays a big part in this too. I find it peculiar that we know kids need creativity to engage so we make sure there’s lots of it initially. Then we gradually take creative play out of the curriculum over time. Even though we know kids learn that way, enjoy it and it improves outcomes🤔
Initially, I was able to write one short post on average of about every 3 weeks. It took a couple of years to build into full blog posts and accumulate to one a week.
Lately I’m consistent in sharing 2-3 blogs a week but my energy is on another level this year and I’ve also managed to write and publish my first e-book (unleashing my inner power).
I’m currently making significant updates to my next book, Migraine & Me: Companion, Guide & Journal. It’s been in first draft for 3 years and I’ve updated it so significantly (from just a journal), it’s a massive amount of work.
I’m meant to have submitted it by now but illness takes priority. It’s challenging to not pile pressure on myself and trust in the process but it’s the only way forward I’ve been able to learn in recent years.
Oh no that must have stung, what your mother said. That can really create a creative block. I love hearing your reflections here, Amber! And congrats on your writing, Wow!
There were a few more stings than that😆 but I’ve done a lot of mother wound healing now.
Oh gosh that sounds harsh! But good for you for all the mother wound healing — I’ve done a lot of that too.
That last bit sent before I’d finished it😆
I had a massive creative block -which spectacularly was to do with my mother (unbeknown to me - I didn’t even know it was there)…
I released it as part of some heart meditation and forgiveness over the summer, which I had to do 3 times for it to work (on top of years of this stuff).
It cleared the biggest energetic block that day and meant this ebook was finally ready for the world 🌎
Mother wound healing…it’s something else. And it is not about blame. Not from this place💜
Yes absolutely it’s not about blame. I got a lot of compassion for my mother when I went theough mother wound healing. And Wow, I love it when blocks are cleared!
I have a lot more compassion for mine too.
Shes still the same mum (I never hear from her and she’s never once been to visit me in over 25 years),
but I can see how she did her best and how challenging life has been for her living in an era where women were only recently allowed bank accounts
and she herself, has experienced untold amounts of trauma. For which there is little insight and understanding of. Never mind support and healing.
Oh this hits home 💖 I used to sing in a choir too (soprano) and now I can't anymore. I really miss it.
My illness has made me incredibly intentional about everything, especially creativity. I'm very limited too in what I can do and when and for how long so if I'm going to start something, then I really mean it (does that make sense?) xx
Absolutely! I find intention and motivation to be incredibly powerful.
It really is 💖
Love this. And very much relate.
I love everything about this essay. It's so true that chronic illness can both help and hinder the creative process. You learn a kind of brutal efficiency when you have such limited energy, and it can help to break down large tasks into manageable chunks, and at the same time you are often so wrung out you have no flow. Thanks for sharing ❤️
“Brutal efficiency”! Love this and it’s so true. And yes, I so miss being in creative flow. Thank you for your reflections 🌸
This is beautiful and helpful. I just posted about how I’ve been struggling to figure out how to be creative in this new body with so many limitations and asked for advice! Thanks for sharing your experience.
This is so helpful. I have recently learnt that I have ADHD...I'm 68 and have been disabled my whole life. Very limited in independence and mobility my creativity has changed recently. It has always been that I had more ideas than energy and would use resting time to fuel ideas. Silly. I would plan future projects and shop for them. I have a house full of art and crafts, wool and fabric. Probably much more than my possible 3 decades left can use. I have put aside the crafts for which I am too disabled, those which are too physical, like screen printing. I focus on those which I can do myself or with controlled help. ( I have a support worker 3 mornings a week, but she is utterly clueless about art sewing or the collections that come with being creative, I can't ask her for help with tidying because her instinct is to bin everything, let alone recycle). Recently I have found an art class that works at my level, and it has been an eye opener. Suddenly, the ability to start at 9.30 and finish at 12, with a led idea, constraints etc, has been a game changer. My skills have developed exponentially and my focus is far better. So I had to think carefully about what is going on in that scenario and see if I can replicate it at home.
1 is beginning with focus. Know what you are intending to do. Part of something... which part.
2 time limit. However short.
3 materials at hand or chosen for someone else to access.
4 do not create with chaos around you.
I'm suddenly intent on making sense of the chaos I tend to live in because I have neither the energy or skill to organise and order it. Previously it would be guaranteed to give me a panic attack. Understanding myself, the impact of ADHD on my thought process has been liberating. Adopting strategies to manage ADHD has helped manage my physical energy too ( do a difficult task for 10 minutes then reward). I don't think my whole house will ever be showhome presentable...there are too many books, but there is already much less stuff.
Wow I love hearing about your process and ways you make it work for you! The art class sounds amazing, I’m so happy to hear you found something that works for you within your limitations 🌸❤️