I’ve had to ditch these writing rules since becoming chronically ill

Following writing rules is not always possible when living with chronic illness. Here are the ones I’ve had to ditch.

This is my last post this season. I’ll be back on the 28th of April (hopefully) with awesome news (hint: I’ll be telling you about my first single and you get a pre-save link). • My body is affected by this damn cold weather, so I have to go on my break a bit earlier than I planned. This makes me sad, but it’s necessary for my health.

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Photo by Yannick Pulver on Unsplash

I’ve always wanted to be a writer. Even when I was working in international development for a global NGO I would daydream about writing my own book and enlightening the world.

And that desire only got stronger after I became ill — now I really had something big to say.

I started writing on a memoir back in 2016. My brain wasn’t as bad as it is today, but I also wasn’t as skilled at the writing process as I am now.

So I started reading craft books and learnt a whole lot of writing rules. I tried them out for a while, but somehow they didn’t seem to work for me and I had to ditch them again.

I’ve had to put the memoir book on hold for now until my brain gets better, but I am able, for certain periods throughout the year, to write this Substack — even when letting go of certain writing rules.

Here are the most significant writing rules I’ve had to ditch.

I don’t write every day

A lot of writing gurus tell you to write everyday.

It is in no way possible for me to do so. My brain is not always awake and my mental health is not always in a place where I can write. Some periods I need to think deeply. And some periods I need to sit with and feel my feelings instead of producing. Sometimes this goes on for weeks or months.

In order for me to write, I need to listen very intently to my bodymind and let it decide whether I can write or not.

I especially listen to the level of acid in my brain and body. If there is too much, I need to rest completely. If only a little, I may be able to write a paragraph.

I’ve chopped the writing process into tiny acts of varying degrees of intensity, which means I have something to do for different brain-states. Sometimes, all I do is let my eyes scroll through an essay or article and see if it randomly picks up any mistakes. Other times, my brain can handle writing a paragraph or even two — and if it’s really awake I might read a paragraph of research, but this rarely happens.

I don’t do morning pages or stream of consciousness writing

While I love the idea of morning pages and know many people for whom this works, it doesn’t for me. The times I’ve tried it I find myself ruminating on the page, saying the same thing over and over and over. It’s mostly stuff like: “I’m so sick and tired of my brain not working, I want it to get better, why is it not better with everything I’m doing, I’m so frustrated, I feel stuck…” and so forth.

It’s not healthy for me. I tried turning morning pages into gratitude, but after writing the same things over and over again (“I’m grateful for a roof over my head, I’m grateful for my parents who care for me…”) I found I got frustrated instead of feeling grateful.

I also found that doing morning pages takes up all my brain energy and I’m not able to do anything else for the rest of the day.

Also, I generally don’t have the energy to focus for that long — yes, it only takes five or so minutes, but it requires one to be focused on what the brain is saying and I don’t have brainpower for that level of concentration.

Another thing that frustrates me about doing morning pages is that a lot of the time my brain is empty. No words or pictures are created. So all that’s left is superficial mental chatter about how frustrating that is. It turns into unhealthy rumination.

I edit while I write

We are often told not to edit as we write as it breaks up the writing flow. But I need to break up the writing flow. I cannot sit in concentration for more than a minute, sometimes even less than that, and editing gives me a short break where I can breathe and let my brain rest.

This tiny break makes it possible for me to dive deep into my brain again. As I’ve written above, my brain is often empty. It therefore requires some digging to get interesting words out on the page that aren’t ruminations.

I don’t write with a deadline

Even though I have a schedule for The Bed Perspective I make sure to never actually have a deadline. I cannot write with a deadline in mind as this forces me to overhear the state my bodymind is in, and deadlines really stress me out, taking up all the energy I need to write.

Instead, I’ve always made sure I have enough material ready for 3 months. In that way I can stick to a schedule, but not be inundated by deadlines.

Certain writing rules can be great for some, but difficult or downright impossible for others. There is no one right way to write or create. It’s more about figuring out what works for you and what doesn’t.

Tell me…

Which writing rules have you had to ditch?

Do you stick to some writing rules? If so, which?

What are your best tips for writing with limitations?

I’d love to know your thoughts!

Thank you so much for reading this post. If you know someone who could benefit from this, then please share this page with them. You are also more than welcome to share it in your Facebook or other patient support groups.

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